Rescuing Desperation

Rescuing Desperation.

Rule number 1. NEVER do it. Rule number 2; always follow rule number one.

It is a common enough problem. Wanting to rescue people from their situation; only to find them right back in it soon after – often us along with them.

The reason this happens is because we are all designed to solve our own “stuff;” learning along the way and the more we learn and share of that knowledge, the greater our contribution and eventually the rewards.

Its impossible to take credit for another’s achievements as is the same impossibility to take credit for their failures.

It is a sensitivity issue that we are dealing with, not the others suffering or incapacity. It is the inability to see things as they really are especially where the other person may improve or correct  irresponsible or negative pattern of behaviour.

I am not being harsh here; far from it. I am simply stating the obvious; the more you rescue that person, the weaker they become. Its far better to support them through the problem. Here, support relates to “Getting them” to solve the emotional consequence of the behaviour and state how they are going to “Handle” things in the future.

At this stage and not before, you can offer whatever you may feel required to achieve those outcomes.

Result… They learn and gain the credits. You become free of the burden of guilt you must have obviously been feeling which caused you to become involved in the first place.

PLEASE NOTE: This is only a summary of the subject; I have a complete set of guidelines available for you to adopt to handle this situation whenever it rears its head – as It surely will, at some stage in your journey.

Feel free to contact me for more information.

Cheers

Keith.